陳淑莊之錯

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28/05/2012

陳淑莊之錯 余若薇

站在舞台一個大交义前的陳淑莊,演出她人生的第一次棟篤笑—-《講女烈傳之戴錯嘢夫人》。陳淑莊的錯,是一失足成千古恨的錯?陰陽差錯的錯?還是錯有錯著的錯?

事前她說有信心,我對她亦有信心,成績仍然比我預期的好。

好,不單只是笑料多,抵死而不低俗,貼近最hit新聞而不忘歷史;而是淚位多,大笑的淚、激情的淚,觸動心靈的熱淚。嘲笑別人較容易演繹 (陳淑莊扮唐英年實在一絕),自嘲向人展露內心的最痛,殊不簡單。

首先佩服陳淑莊可以穿著那要命的尖頭4吋幼踭高跟鞋,站足兩小時 (未計同日午場又兩小時),又跑又唱又跳,扮周一嶽震音,又扮葉問踢腿,衣又緊褲又窄;男人搞棟篤笑至少可穿得舒服點講鹹古,女人可不能。

當然還有她那股定力與記憶力,這三個星期,我在立法會每天看著她開會看文件之餘 ,(包括那晚通宵開大會,清晨5時她和吳靄儀到立法會主席辦公室參與閉門會議,反對曾鈺成主席「剪布」,第二天早上拉著我要提不信任主席動議),拚命搜羅劇本、歌詞;演出前一星期才集齊稿件開始正式背誦,沒有丁點兒的慌張,只聽見她經常開懷格格大笑。

胡鬧的笑劇,只不過一場腹肌運動,看後便忘掉:好的笑劇不單笑中帶淚,還有那不能釋懷的message。

陳淑莊給我的message是她去年40歲生辰買給自己的一份「大」禮──床褥一張。台灣總統大選蔡英文敗給馬英九後發表演說,她鼓勵哭成淚人的支持者不要放棄,還差一哩路民進黨便到山頂;鏡頭一轉,陳淑莊出場,告訴大家她剛從山頂下來,大特寫是她去年輸掉山頂區議會議席的情景,豆大的淚珠從她眼眶滲出來,一顆顆滑下疲乏的臉龐,旁邊的公民黨黨魁梁家傑激昂陳詞,甚麽「光榮」、「驕傲」、「努力」,我懷疑有多少共鳴者,因為我知道,參與民主運動,永遠是付出與收穫不成正比。

 

陳淑莊解釋床褥的選擇:10年前她因搬離母親開始獨居的生活要買新床褥,當時以為10年後更換時,應是雙人床褥,陰陽差錯,透過舞台而認識了同是大律師的我,踏上政途,錯過了為人妻、為人母的機會,變了今天的「剩女代言人」,是她真正選擇?

穿著婚紗的陳淑莊向大家介紹媽媽為她精挑細選的五名男友,來一場五「衰」公投,從梁福元到梁振英,逐一品評,最後還加一個五人混合體,令人笑出淚水。為何特首選舉的民間公投有12萬香港人排長龍也要投白票,是無得揀?不會揀?還是一個真正的選擇?

陳淑莊給自己一張新床褥,將英文諺句 “If you make your bed, you must lie in it”改良為 “Since this is your bed, you may as well give yourself a good mattress” ,既來之,則安之。

老實說,偶爾我也想12年的從政生涯,錯過了甚麽,轉頭還是多想得了些甚麽吧。

Robert Frost 最著名的詩 “The Road Not Taken” ,作者為選擇了一條較少人走的路而嘆氣,今天依然有人爭論那是遺憾的嘆氣,還是滿足的嘆息,只有作者才知道。

“The Road Not Taken”

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

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